What I Couldn't Do
by Sara Stone
Summary: Knowing, understanding and admitting to anything and/or everything can be difficult. But why does it get worse the more you try? Naruto has always had a problem with losing and he's not giving up this time either!


**Summary:**

**Knowing, understanding and admitting to anything and/or everything can be difficult. But why does it get worse the more you try? Naruto has always had a problem with losing and he's not giving up this time either!**

**Authors note:**

**I'll keep this as short as possible. This is my first story, reviews welcomed. Flames are accepted justified (If it is unreadable, or just angry spewing of words I will dismiss the whole thing. I expect most reviewers know English fluently by now.) I have a brief idea of where this is going, suggestions are always welcomed and credit will be given to those that inspire ideas (even a better title). I want to use most of the actual plot from when the Ninja war started in the series, so if I spoil something I'm apologize, and I will be adding in my own themes.**

**Standard disclaimers: I do not own any aspect of Naruto, Masashi Kishimoto does. This disclaimer applies to the whole story, as I'm sure I'll forget to put this in.**

**Now enjoy.**

The clouds were still in the sky over Konoha, at first glance. If one was watching carefully, like Shikamaru was then it was obvious that they were moving in a southern direction in the sky. It was a peacefully nice day, one he would've slept though a couple years ago. The air was crisp and clean to breathe in, it wasn't hot or cold today, but that depends on who you were. The village was chattering quietly with its masses of civilians. It was almost like it was before the attack.

But Shikamaru would not allow painful memories to enter his mind during his cloud watching though, as it was his time of peace. His lazy expression as he feigned sleep did not change even as Choji, his best friend started munching on something beside him. It had become a background noise he was most accustomed too, like the rumbling of the village or the call of messenger hawk as it flew by.

"Shikamaru!" A loud voice sounded in a long yell that indicated he was far away. Shikamaru could picture the owner of the voice, jumping over with boundless energy and optimism, just to disturb him. Shikamaru sometimes wondered if the young man enjoyed it.

Shikamaru rolled over on his side, pretending to be asleep if only not to deal with Naruto's problems. Naruto only ever came after someone if he needed advice, had a mission, needing a sparring partner, and even when looking for a sparring partner he would ask anyone who caught his eye first. Shikamaru was not interested in any such activities today, and since he hadn't called Choji as well he assumed it was a mission. He knew he would have it take it if that was the case, but still he could avoid everything else.

"Hello Naruto." Choji said though a mouth full of food, though still being as understandable as someone without. That took years of practice, and may have actually been a skill Choji was proud of. A small thump on the ground was the only noise made by Naruto's arrival.

"Hey Choji." Naruto replied, moving over to stand over Shikamaru and block the sun from beating down on the sleeping boy. He didn't move or tell him off, but the blonde would not be put off that easy. "Oi, I got an idea." He said in a devious tone to the fuller sized ninja. Shikamaru could picture his devious smirk so well it almost made him want to move.

"I don't think so Naruto." Choji replied before even hearing him out.

"So he is awake." Shikamaru could hear the grin on Naruto's face as he said it. He winced and got up. It wasn't Choji's fault but he glared at both of them anyway, before dropping back to his normal lazy expression and sitting position.

"What is it Naruto?" Shikamaru said in a bored tone. "You don't seem to have a mission scroll, so I guess what's wrong is the question." He droned on.

Naruto's grin vanished as he hand went behind his head in his obvious discomfort. "Jeez give me some credit! I don't always come to you for my problems." He complained loudly.

"Oh really?" Shikamaru replied. "Then why are you here."

Naruto looked at the ground for awhile before muttering. "I'm not exactly sure now…"

"Well then we can't help you," Shikamaru said lying back down. One of the things that had also change in Konoha is that there were more flat roofs for Ninja to sprint across, which meant more areas for him to try and get some rest on. He still missed his old favorite spot though. "Out of the sunlight."

Naruto took a few seconds to move and sat in front of Choji. "Maybe it is a problem."

"So Naruto, did Sakura reject you again?" Choji asked. Naruto shook his head. "Got a beyond boring mission from Tsunade and need a lackey?" Naruto shook his head again. He had only done that once, and Choji was just making fun of him. "So there are no new leads?" Choji didn't dare speak the name, but Naruto clenched his fist before shaking his head again.

"It's not the usual problems. In fact it's a really weird one. Have either of your talked to Hinata lately?" Naruto said getting straight down to the point.

"I am not a person of many words Naruto, and neither is Hinata, so we aren't really close." Shikamaru said. "Why not ask someone on her team?"

"Last time I talked to her was about a week ago, and that's because we were in the same line to get into a restaurant. Since my families given special consideration in restaurants, I was able to invite her to dinner with me and catch up bit." It was no secret that the Akimichi family ate a lot and had the money to do so, so of course they were given a seat anywhere fast. Naruto had once seen a table being reserved for any member of their clan even though there was a massive line to get in.

"That's weird, because every time I approach her she seems in a hurry to get somewhere."

"We just finished a war last year Naruto, everyone's been busy." Shikamaru justified for the girl. It wasn't everyday that you confess to someone only to have them forget about it. He never recalled Naruto ever really saying he didn't remember how he almost turned into the Kyuubi, Just that he was glad he did, but didn't turn into it. Another mystery Shikamaru dismissed.

"Well Choji, is she ok?" Naruto asked. He was always worried about his friends after all.

"She said she was well." Choji knew how vague his answer sounded and could tell Naruto was planning to ambush her by the way his eyes seemed to be glaring at the sky. Choji decided more detail was needed if Naruto wasn't going to make a fool of himself. Then again no amount of preparation could prevent that.

"She's been reinstated by her family as a member of the main branch again, and her sister did well in the Chunin exams, She's probably helping prepare her sister, which is why she can't talk. She been busy helping anyone she can from the sound of it." Choji informed him, it wasn't really private news, but Naruto hardly heard anything about clan matters because he did not belong to one that was recognized now.

"Oh." Naruto said relief showing on his face. "Yeah Konohamaru has been asking me to spar with him recently because of the Chunin exams. I should've known."

"Anything else you need?" Choji asked before getting up, he had some light training to do before his second lunch after all. While Naruto could put it away in one go, Choji preferred to break up his day a lot more for his love of food.

"Nah thanks Choji and Shikamaru, Ino was looking for you." Naruto grinned before taking off. A short glance behind him showed the genius moving faster than Naruto had ever seen him move, outside of battle of course. Naruto laughed heartedly, he could still cause trouble among even the smartest of the ninja ranks.

The reason why I had been worried about Hinata was because last week at the festival between the Chunin exams there was a break, and a festival was held around now to celebrate the end of the fourth ninja war. Naruto had been with Sai, Kakashi and Yamato.

It was a bittersweet celebration. People mourned throughout the day, and tried to remain strong. The village lit up with lamps at night, and stalls for games, items and other things were opened up. Tsunade had declared it was disrespectful to mope around in our loved ones absences, so we should live life for them. This at least got people to lose some inhibition and just have fun. It was only for three nights after all.

The guys were wearing normal clothes that night. I had invited Sakura but she said she was going with Ino already. This was the first time all four of us came together for a night of fun for awhile. I didn't let the mature demeanor of my friend and teachers quiet me though and made enough noise for all of them as they played games. Even with their headbands on the visibly relaxed, even the prospect of overnight guard duty ahead of us

They had guard duty for the late night till early morning, but I was the only one who stayed up during the day so I was pretty melo right about now, considering what would've happened had I napped all day.

"Kakashi sensei! How do you keep beating me!" I complained more than asked. Kakashi's eye closed and I got the feeling he had that mysterious grin on his face.

"Maybe that question is more of why do you keep losing." Sai whispered beside me loud enough to hear.

"You better stop that!" I turned on him, his nearly pessimistic way of looking at things ground up my nerves. But I couldn't raise my fist at him like before, it was pointless. And also friends should never fight in peace. War did funny things to people. I wasn't one to be outwardly or deeply affected by it, but there were subtle changes that took someone who really knew him to notice. I no longer fought tooth and limb to get a higher rank mission from the cranky Hokage, but would rather complete it quickly and hope I got a better one (if only for good behavior), though I would still argue about C or D rank ones. I was a Chunin now, but with the war meant a down fall on Genin, and children shouldn't have to fear for their mortality, so he didn't blame them for dropping out of the academy. I no longer trained myself to the point of exhaustion because of how Sakura reacted; I don't want to worry her anymore. I even ate ramen slower (not by much though), because often my mind was floating with more thoughts then I could handle.

It was true the village was recovering pretty well but the cash flow was still strained and trade was sometimes slow. Homes were still being built and there were three more orphanages than before Pein leveled most of Konoha. People were turning up in the village every week or so, most with no small village to return to in the first place and looking for a fresh start. Taxes were high on the richer clans, which they fought to reduce every other day. 'The problem could've been solved it they just handed over the money by now' Tsunade had said. It angered me but at the same time all I could do while being civil and understand as Tsunade had demanded was to in turn demand the maximum tax taken from my missions, or asked if I could do it for charity if it was a Konoha civilian that was paying.

I had more than enough money from traveling with Jiraiya. There was a cold stab in my chest at the thought, but the pain of lose subsided after that, life went on. I wasn't only person who lost someone important, but I did try to keep his memory alive, often talking about Tsunade with him. She had explained early that Jiraiya would be remembered by everyone who knew him and by history as the Sannin that taught both and fourth and (I hoped) sixth Hokage.

I pulled myself back to where Yamato was telling _me_ to hurry up. I waved that I was coming, until I saw Neji in the corner of my sight and gestured I needed a minute, if he understood my flailing arms.

"Neji!" I called to him as I approached. Neji turned and nodded, he was with many other Hyuga's from what I could see. If it wasn't for their graceful movements and focused eyes you would've thought they were a really large group of blind civilians, but again you'd still be wrong because of their expensive Kimonos they were all sporting. Well fare couldn't afford that right now.

"Yes Naruto?" Neji asked politely.

"Sorry I only need him for a moment." I said upon the glare of a familiar face, I couldn't place a name on him right now though and dismissed it. Neji led me far enough away from his family members.

"Wow, scary man." I said, glad to be out of his presence.

"That was my Uncle, try to be respectful." Neji corrected, he sounded annoyed and humored at the same time, and stoic all at once.

"Sorry Neji." I said sincerely. "I was wondering if you could help me train tomorrow. I need to practice at not looking into someone's eyes and thought you be perfect."

"Really, why is that?"

"Well you got a glare that could freeze water, and you're pretty strong."

"Still haven't given up on Sasuke?" Neji asked, not taking any offence to my bluntness; it was what distinguished him as an honest friend after all.

"It hasn't ended until one of us is dead or he surrenders." I said determined.

"Well I hope that you are the victor should someone have to die." There was a quick silence. I looked away from Neji to see that Hinata had joined us.

"Umm…Neji?" Hinata uttered out with a light blush on her face. She must've been embarrassed from intruding on their conversation, though with how loud I talked everyone could've probably heard one half of the conversation anyway.

"Sorry Lady Hinata. I'll see you at training ground 13 at 10 am Naruto." Neji nodded his head as he turned to return to his family.

"Alright." I tried not to be annoyed by the fact Neji had not asked if the time was alright with me, but then again Neji didn't have to do this.

"It's was good to see you Hinata." I said mostly out of politeness. She glanced towards me with those eyes. They were scared, panicked and most of all, alone. She recovered quickly by nodding with a small strained smile and turning her head down as she left without a word to me behind her cousin.

I knew those eyes too well and frowned at her retreating figure before catching up to my friends for some more fun before duty.

That event is what had me trying to track down Hinata for the last week but I knew too little about her to find her without everyone knowing I was looking for her; she didn't exactly have long conversations with me. She spent most of her time in the Hyuga compound I had learned, and I didn't want to disturb her training with her team mates. When I saw the size of the new Hyuga compound I really wondered if it was necessary, but it was in a far corner of the village so it could be the one before the attack. I couldn't remember seeing the other one. I had also hoped that they weren't avoiding the taxes if they could afford that place.

Once it was out that I was looking for her she stopped training at the grounds and had Kiba and Shino come visit her at the compound. Now I know I wasn't the quickest minded with social matters, but it seemed like she didn't want to be friends with me anymore, avoiding me or I was being paranoid. I asked Kiba about it and he said she was just being conservative lately; she was probably trying to de stress a bit. I needed to find out why she would do that, or even need to.


End file.
